
Self-Control
What is Self-Control?
Introduction
Tonight we’re going to be finishing up our sermon series on the Fruit of the Spirit, by giving attention to the final item listed on Galatians 5:23 – the spiritual fruit of self-control. If you have a Bible nearby, turn with me to Galatians 5 – and I’ll read verses 16 through 23. If you’re using one of our church Bibles, you can find the text on page 916. But before I read our text this evening, let’s pray and ask for God to help us as we come to His Word:
[Pray and Read Text]
Focused on Self
I think that many of us are aware – American culture is rather individualistic. Compared to many other cultures, Americans often don’t tend to feel much attachment to their community, or even their own families. Instead, there’s a rather strong fascination with self. And this explains why Americans have been so caught up with self-help, self-care, self-actualization, self-identification, self-regulation – and yes, taking selfies on their smart phones. The social atmosphere around us inclines us toward being very self-conscious – if not outright self-centered.
So I expect that for some of us, when we come to this last fruit of the Spirit, to self-control, it may initially appear to be a different brand name, marketing the same product. Just by the sound of it, self-control may seem to be just one more of these attitudes that are fixated on self. But even though Biblical self-control necessarily involves the self, as the word itself implies, self-control isn’t ultimately self-focused. And it’s my hope that our time in Scripture tonight will help us to gain a stronger appreciation for self-control, and a deeper adoration for the God who bears good fruit in his people by His Spirit.
I’ll unpack what the Bible teaches on self-control by answering three questions tonight. First, what is self control? Second, why should we want self-control? And third, how can we be self-controlled without being self-centered? Then, I’ll briefly wrap up this series by summarizing a few practical points on why remembering the various fruits of the Spirit is important.
What is Self-Control?
So again, the first question we’ll consider together is “What is self-control?”
There are two different words that are used in the New Testament that are often translated as “self-control.” One of those words speaks more to the steadiness of someone’s mind. It’s synonymous with being sober-minded. For example, this word appears in 1 Peter 4, verse 7, which says, “The end of all things is at hand; therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded for the sake of your prayers.” And certainly, having steady-mindedness is an important dimension of self-control.
But the word translated self-control in Galatians 5 goes a bit beyond that. The word used here is more explicitly connected to the idea of exercising personal restraint – being self-disciplined. And this means that such a person won’t follow his or her personal emotions, passions, or cravings. But instead, a self-controlled person will lead those inner attitudes and appetites, in order to make sure that they’re directed toward the right type of things. We could define self-control as being a consistent exercise of personal restraint, directed by particular goals or virtues. I’ll repeat that definition again: a consistent exercise of personal restraint, directed by particular goals or virtues.
And I’m giving this as the definition for self-control because the apostle Paul, who wrote Galatians – he further describes what self-control looks like in another one of his letters, by likening Christian self-control to the self-control of an athlete in 1 Corinthians 9:25. He says, “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.”
You’ll see that the athlete’s self-control is consistent: “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things – there’s a mental aspect of this, a volitional aspect of self-control. The athlete needs to abide by sleep schedules, strict diets, and strenuous workout routines. In all things, there’s a consistency to the athlete’s exercise of personal restraint. The athlete’s self-control is also shown to be directed by particular goals or virtues. He doesn’t run aimlessly, but the athlete specifically is focused, in this case, on obtaining a perishable wreath – the prize that comes with winning the contest. He’s directed by particular goals or virtues. So this athlete analogy from 1 Corinthians 9 helps us to gain a clear, practical understanding of what self-control looks like. Our self-control is likewise intended to be “a consistent exercise of personal restraint, directed by particular goals or virtue.”
But one of the main distinctions you’ll notice between the self-control of the worldly-minded athlete and the self-control of the Christian is that we’re aimed at different goals. An unbelieving athlete, on the one hand, is seeking his own passions. He’s outwardly self-disciplined, yet inwardly he has an unrestrained, fleshly yearning for self-promotion. The athlete is aiming for a prize that will perish. But the Christian life is marked by both outward and inward self-restraint. He aligns his behaviors according to priorities that have been ordered by God. And he does this, by faith to gain an unseen, enduring prize that’s provided by God himself. On the outside, the exertion and the personal restraint between these two people may be indistinguishable. But Christian self-control is guided by spiritual objectives rather than selfish ambitions.
Before we move on, though, I want to point out one more example of what self-control isn’t, so we can more clearly see the difference between counterfeits and the real thing. Specifically, we should understand that self-control is not the same thing as self-deprivation, or asceticism. Though this may not be a great danger for us, as Americans, there are a number of people who can fall into the trap of thinking that pursuing poverty or self-inflicting some sort of pain is inherently virtuous. Rather than self-discipline being a means by which we strive toward a higher objective, some people make self-deprivation to be an end in itself. But this isn’t the self-control that the Bible urges us into – and the Bible teaches against asceticism, in places like Colossians 2:23.
But, in our American context, that usually isn’t our danger. Instead, the call to self-control is a helpful corrective to the constant temptation we have to give in to self-indulgence. We live in a world where we’re constantly hearing, “Listen to your heart.” “You do you.” “Do what makes you happy.” “You deserve this!” But this mindset of self-indulgence is marked by the absence of personal restraint. And instead of being aimed at a higher goal or virtue, it’s often driven by animal-like aspirations. Self-indulgence essentially dehumanizes us, because it’s motivated by the same attitude that a pig has when it waddles up to its food trough. We shouldn’t find that way of operating attractive or desirable. It should be clear to us that self-control is the better way. Self-control is the way of God’s Spirit.
Why Should We Want Self-Control?
Of course, you and I can say that self-control is more worthwhile. But it’s helpful to remember specific reasons why, so we’re spurred on to pursue self-control more earnestly. So the second question I want to address tonight is why should we want self-control? Why is it a good thing – a needed thing? Let me give a few brief reasons why. A couple of these reasons will be similar to things I’ve mentioned in previous weeks – but others are more unique to self-control.
To start with, we should want self-control when we consider how wicked an uncontrolled self would be. When people go against their consciences and God’s law – when they let go of self-restraint and give themselves over to their passions, they produce the works of the flesh mentioned in Galatians 5. They produce sexual immorality, idolatry, anger, drunkenness, and follow similar passions. And if we take time to think through what an unrestrained life practically looks like, and the sort of society it would lead to, it should lead us to value and desire self-control.
We should also want self-control because it’s a characteristic of God. We were made to reflect his likeness, and to bring glory to him for his greatness. We should desire to be who we were created to be.
Another reason why we should want self-control is because it’s a gift that God wants to share with us. He wants us to receive it, and put it on. Just as the bride will want to put on the jewelry that delights her husband, the Church should be eager to adorn herself out of love for Christ.
And frankly, we should also want self-control because of the good benefits that flow from it. A disorganized, lazy person will generally have worse health, less money, and fewer healthy relationships than someone who has self-control. When people have the self-discipline to work hard, to eat well, and to be discerning and controlled in social situations – these kinds of personal restraint tend to make life more pleasant in the long-run. As Proverbs 13:4 says, “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.”
How Can We Be Self-Controlled without Being Self-Centered?
I’m sure we could find how Scripture suggests a number of other reasons why self-control is desirable, but let’s keep moving and address my third question, here: specifically, how can we be self-controlled without being self-centered?
I think there are three helpful considerations to keep in mind, to keep our self-control from becoming self-absorbed.
First, we should remind ourselves where self-control comes from. I’ve already reminded you just a moment ago how self-control is a gift from God. But this is a reality we need to continue to keep in mind, so that we don’t fall into the trap of thinking that our self-discipline and personal management flow from our own greatness. If, in reliance on the Spirit, we’re able to put aside distractions and fleshly passions, for the sake of racing ahead into acts of love and decisions of faith – if we have self-control like this, we should fall on our faces before God and give him thanks. And if we’re lacking self-control like this, we shouldn’t wallow in discouragement with ourselves, or beat ourselves up. But in each new day, we should ask God to help us grow, and we should labor with all the strength he provides to move ahead. Self-control shouldn’t make us more obsessed with self-performance, but more appreciative of God’s kindness.
Second, our self-control won’t become self-absorbed when we remember what our self-control is for – or rather who our self-control is for. The goals and virtues that direct our self-control shouldn’t be self-determined – we should be directed by the priorities handed down to us by God. This is hard, because I think that many of us like to work for ourselves. And I think if we’re honest with ourselves, much of our personal restraint isn’t motivated by love for God, or a delight to be like him – but instead we have a strong work ethic and self-discipline because we’re looking to gain some sort of earthly self-advantage. We keep ourselves on task so we can advance in our career, or because we want the kids that we’re homeschooling to be smarter than everyone else’s kids – or we’re focused on finishing up a project ASAP so we can reward ourselves with leisure time. But if, by the Spirit, we’re able to see that God’s motivations for our self-control are better than our own – and if we’re deciding to align our priorities with God’s goals and virtues – then self-control will be less focused on self, and much more focused on God, as it ought to be.
Third and finally, though, pursuing self-control won’t result in self-absorption if we our pursuit keeps bringing us back to gaze at the example of Jesus. I think when many people think of self-control, they have a hard time relating to it, because it just seems like a vague, immaterial idea. But even though self-control is spiritual – a fruit of the Spirit – that doesn’t mean that it’s intangible. Instead, God has given us a real, flesh-and-blood demonstration of self-control in the person and work of our Lord Jesus Christ. He carried out his whole life and ministry in reliance on the power of the Holy Spirit. His life was filled with the fruits of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
And we can clearly see the glory of Jesus’s self-control, in contrast to the failings of humanity. You may remember, Adam and Eve were well-fed and surrounded by a garden paradise. And yet when they were tempted with a bite from the forbidden fruit, they were unable to withstand the devil’s enticements. Jesus, on the other hand, was in the wilderness and had been deprived of food for forty days and nights. And yet when the devil tried to entice Jesus with the bread of unbelief, Jesus restrained his appetites, his emotions, and his actions. And he resisted temptation. In fact, he resisted temptation until the bitter end – though he was sweating drops of blood in the garden of Gethsemane, even though he was utterly distressed by the awful weight of God’s wrath he would bear for the sins of his people – Jesus didn’t run away. He didn’t hide himself when Judas arrived to betray him. He didn’t defend himself when he was falsely accused. He didn’t throw down fire from heaven upon the crooks who were convicting him, or the crowds that were mocking him. He didn’t call for angels to take him down for the cross. Despite all the emotional turmoil and physical torture, Jesus didn’t give up on us. He refused to give us over to the torments of judgment that we deserved. But he subjected himself to death in our place – his self-control was perfect and complete. And he urges us to walk in the same Spirit, fueled by the same desires to glorify our heavenly Father and to show grace to the sinners around us. Our thoughts on self-control, then, shouldn’t be caught up with self – but with Christ.
What Do the Fruits of the Spirit Teach Us about Life?
And as we wrap up this sermon series from Galatians 5, let me just give three quick encouragements, for how these fruits of the Spirit should continue to help us in the months and years ahead.
First, we should remember, that these spiritual fruits reflect the greatness and the perfections of our God. Before dashing off to try to reproduce these things for ourselves, it’s wise for us to contemplate who God is, in his love, joy, peace, patience, and so on. He is the forever-flowing spring of virtue – the inexhaustible fountain of every excellency. And being reminded of this, here, in Galatians 5, should energize our worship.
Second, the fruits of the Spirit here remind us what God wants to see reflected in his people. These things are God’s priority for us. His concern isn’t so much academic – how you talented you become in math and reading. His emphasis isn’t placed on perfecting skills – like playing an instrument, administrating a business, managing a house, growing plants, or fixing things that are broken. He isn’t concerned about cultural standards of what it means to be successful, or well-adjusted. But instead, God’s chief priority is that his people would reflect his character. Now, absolutely, godly people will tend to pursue more knowledge of God’s world, and greater skillfulness as God’s servants. But if we’re not careful, we can fall into the trap of making a Christian sub-culture that emphasizes patterns of outward habits, instead of placing the right emphasis on inward character. The lives of faithful Christians may not all look the same, especially with the complexities that can sometimes exist in a fallen world. But all of us are called to embody the same spiritual fruits, in accordance with the likeness of God’s righteous character. And if this is God’s emphasis, it’s right that this would be our emphasis as well.
But finally, as we remember the fruits of God’s Spirit, it’s helpful for us to remember, we need God for every good work. Apple branches need to be attached to the tree in order to bear fruit. And in a similar way, if we’re going to be fruitful, we need to be joined to Christ by faith and we need the life of His Spirit in us. It isn’t our good works that save us and bring us to God. But it’s God who saves, and who brings us into good works, by his Spirit. We won’t ever outgrow this reliance on God’s Spirit. And, really, we shouldn’t ever want to. God has granted us the opportunity to display goodness that’s divine! Why would we think it’s better for us to showcase something that’s manmade? The work of God’s Spirit in his people is mysterious and wonderful. It should never cease to amaze and encourage us. Because God gives his creatures the extraordinary opportunity to love others with a divine love – a love that’s truly through us, and yet not ultimately from us. With all these spiritual fruits – we serve as billboards that broadcast a message that’s higher than us, that display goodness that’s greater than us, and that point to greatness beyond us. The greatest things we take hold of in this life, are brought to us by the Spirit of God.
So as we wrap up this series on the fruit of the Spirit, I hope that God’s Word here continues to give you grateful, worshipful hearts – and that you’re all the more eager to join together with your brothers and sisters, to display the excellencies of our God. Let’s pray: