How Should Men and Women Operate in the Church?

Instructions for Strengthening the Church

Ever since the start of the semester, Pastor Josh and I have been taking turns, and we’ve been slowly working our way through a part of the New Testament called 1 Timothy. In recent weeks, we’ve seen that 1 Timothy was written by the apostle Paul – by one of the men that Jesus hand-picked to be a special ambassador for the Christian faith. This man, Paul, traveled throughout the Roman Empire to proclaim the good news about Christ and to gather men and women who believed (and their families) into churches. But he didn’t do this alone. Paul carried out this work with a number of different helpers. And one of his primary co-laborers was this man, Timothy, who’s the recipient of this letter.

In addition to helping Paul establish churches around the Mediterranean Sea, Timothy was also regularly sent back to strengthen those churches. In 1 Thessalonians 3(:1-2) and 1 Corinthians 4(:17), Timothy is sent back to encourage the churches in Thessalonica and Corinth. And at the time that this letter was written, it’s believed that Timothy has been sent back to the church in Ephesus. And the Spirit of God gave us this letter through Paul, because it gives us important insight into how the Christian church is supposed to be organized, overseen, and strengthened.

And Pastor Josh pointed this out a couple weeks ago. This section of the letter gives specific instructions on how relationships in the church should function, to bring long-term structure and stability. With that being said, I recognize, that depending on your background, the words we read in our text this evening will either seem very normal and helpful – or the things we read may seem very surprising, or possibly even offensive.

But as we get into our text, I want to explain how the potentially hard teaching we see here is actually intended by God to be a healthy teaching – a teaching that strengthens and helps his people, rather than bringing harm. And so if you have a Bible nearby, please turn with me to 1 Timothy, Chapter 2. And tonight I’ll be reading verses 8 through 15. We’ll see what this part of the Bible doesn’t mean and what it does mean in just a minute. But before we get in, let’s pray, and let’s ask that the Lord would give us a broader understanding of his word, and bigger appreciation for his wisdom. So please pray with me:

[Pray and Read Text]

Appreciating Differences Between Men and Women

Now, in our text this evening, I imagine that it’s pretty clear that this section of God’s Word makes some distinctions between men and women, and prescribes different things for them. And remember, the whole reason why these instructions are being given is because Paul wants Timothy to strengthen the churches. He wants Timothy to establish them in sound doctrine – healthy teaching – that will promote the long-term joy and stability of God’s people.

And so to understand this text better, we’ll break it down into four parts. First, in verse 8, we’ll look at the responsibilities that are given to men. Then, in verse 9 through 12, we’ll look at the role that’s described for women in the Church. Then in verses 13 through 14, we’ll look at the reasoning behind Manhood and Womanhood, as it’s laid out here. And then finally, in verse 15, we’ll consider the rescue of sinful humanity. So if you’re taking notes, those will be our four points – the responsibilities of Men, the role of women, the reasoning behind manhood and womanhood, and the rescue of sinful humanity.

The Responsibilities of Men (vs. 8)

So first, look with me at verse 8. Pastor Josh mentioned this briefly last week – but here Paul very specifically explains a few responsibilities of men. He ways, “I desire, then, that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling.”

Now, what’s helpful to keep in mind here, is that this description doesn’t give us a complete picture of what it means to be a godly man. But Paul’s especially focused, here, on explaining what a man should look like in the context of the church and its worship. And in this short description, Paul points out four spiritual matters that men, in particular, need to be attentive to for the health of the church.

First, Paul says that he desires the men in every place to pray. Pastor Josh explained the importance of prayer in the church a couple weeks ago. But it’s interesting, the Spirit of God indicates that it’s especially necessary for men to be reminded to pray. The reason for this isn’t directly stated here. But it would seem that men are more inclined toward apathy, more inclined toward self-reliance, and more inclined toward other attitudes of the heart that produce prayerlessness. And so men in the church, in particular, are reminded that they have a responsibility to labor in prayer.

But Paul also mentions a second thing – that men should do this – they should pray, by lifting up holy hands. The idea of lifting up hands is a common reference to worship – especially prayerful worship – in the Old Testament. Psalm 134, verse 2, urges worshippers: “Lift up your hands to the holy place, and bless the LORD.” But you’ll notice, in our text, Paul doesn’t just urge men to lift up their hands to the holy place. But he urges them to lift up holy hands. As a quick reminder, if something is holy, that means that it’s sacred. It’s set apart from ordinary usage, to belong to God. And so men are being told, here, that the hands that they lift up in worship should be holy – that their hands, and all the things that they do with their hands, should be set apart for God.

And it would seem, again, that this responsibility is specifically directed toward men because men have an inclination to have unholy hands. Even though our hands should be set apart to work each day for God, it’s tempting to employ our hands in service to other things instead – things like money, power, or self-indulgence. And so Paul reminds men of their responsibility to use their hands chiefly for God’s glory, instead of using their hands to serve other masters, or to do shameful things.

Then there’s a third responsibility we see in verse 8. Men are told to pray and worship like this without anger. Paul seems to observe that if people show up to church angry – if they show up frustrated because of how long it took for the kids to get ready, or irritated about traffic, or bitter about recent events – then that anger will get in the way of their own ability to worship, and it’ll likely have a negative impact on their brothers and sisters, as well.

And the fourth and final responsibility that Paul mentions for men, here, is similar. Men should pray and worship without quarreling. Men need to put their egos aside. They shouldn’t let it get under their skin if someone says something that comes across as insulting or foolish. Men mustn’t take it personally when they explain their ideas or beliefs to someone, and that other person doesn’t immediately change their mind. Men need to have the ability to keep their heart and check – and to humble themselves before their brothers and sisters, instead of feeling the need to argue and to prove that they’re in the right. It’s important for their own worship – and it’s important for the health of the church.

The Role of Women (vs. 9-12)

But in verses 9 through 12, Paul then gives Timothy some specific instructions for women in the church. And it’s implied, based on how God designed women to function, that these are instructions that they likewise need to hear. And so this brings us to my second main point, dealing with the role of women.

And so first, in verse 9, women are told that they should adorn themselves with respectable apparel. I think for most of us, our minds might immediately think of dress clothes or pretty skirts. But from the text, here, it’s clear that Paul has something different in mind. Because the respectable apparel he’s talking about here isn’t any particular type of clothing. But he’s encouraging women to have a heart that is rightly dressed for worship. He’s saying that when they come before the Lord, they should dress themselves in modesty (by having an attitude that shows respect to others). And they should clothe themselves in self-control.

And I think you can see what’s happening here. Paul understands that women have a desire to be beautiful – which is a fine desire. They have a desire to dress up in a way that’s respectable, and right. And yet for many women, the problem is that the dressing up just happens on the outside. There’s a temptation for women to want attention and admiration from people for their social charm, or their luscious hair, or their sparking jewelry, or their physical attractiveness.

And yet – Paul wants women to remember – their worth isn’t measured by the approval they get from other people. And when we gather for worship, our goal shouldn’t be to draw attention to ourselves, but to dress in a way that’s decent and undistracting so that we can all give our attention to God. When women prepare for Sundays, their focus should be on the beauty of their inner character – not just on the brightness of their external clothing. When we get ready for worship, the matter of utmost importance isn’t whether your blouse matches the color of your eyes. Instead, the question is whether your heart-posture matches with the right attitude of a worshipper.

Now, it could be argued that Paul’s encouragement, here, for women to dress in respectable apparel, also implies that it’s appropriate to wear nice clothes when the Church gathers. Certainly, Paul isn’t telling us to dress in rags. And yet we need to keep Paul’s main point in view here. Whenever you’re getting ready to go out and serve the Lord, your outward appearance is of secondary importance. God’s first priority is that you would focus on dressing yourself with the dazzling radiance of a good heart. It’s probably a word that all of us need to be reminded of – but the Spirit of God indicates that it’s especially necessary for women.

But the role of women in the church is described a second way, in our text. There’s another word of instruction given in verses 11 and 12. Paul says, “Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man. Rather, she is to remain quiet.”

Now, I need to acknowledge here. This part of the Bible has sometimes been abused (and has sometimes been ignored) in church history. And of course, neither of those responses is going to lead to good outcomes. These instructions were originally given for the health and strengthening of the church. And so we should take some time to rightly understand what is being said here, and what isn’t being said here.

So there are four key parts of these instructions that I want to explain as we work through the text here. It’s important to point out that the very first thing Paul says in verse 11, is “Let a woman learn…” Or to say it another way – let a woman be educated in the Scriptures. This is significant, because in the days that Paul was writing, the Romans and the Greeks often excluded women from learning about their religious philosophies. In nearly every way, women in the Roman empire were viewed as inferior to men.

And yet, here, Paul insists that women should be permitted to learn in the context of the church. Women should be allowed to hear the same sermons that their husbands hear. It shouldn’t be believed that women are intellectually limited, or that giving them teaching like this will be a waste of time. Instead, Paul wants to make sure that women, as well men, are learning – because he recognizes that Biblically-rooted women have an important role to play for the long-term strength and health of the church.

In the Bible, here, we have a second letter that Paul wrote to Timothy. And Paul very deliberately points out in 2 Timothy 1, verse 5, how Timothy was raised in the Christian faith by his grandmother, Lois, and his mother, Eunice. The investment of godly mothers and grandmothers in the life of the church is a precious thing – and its value shouldn’t be underestimated.

So as we’re reading Paul’s instructions here in our text, he isn’t writing with a prejudice against the value or importance of women. He isn’t blinded by his cultural context into thinking that women are inferior to men. Paul very much values the role that well-informed Christian women have in among us.

And yet, Paul still acknowledges that women and men have different roles and different responsibilities. And this is why, in verse 11, he urges women to learn quietly with all submissiveness. And this is also why he goes in verse 12 to say that he doesn’t permit a women to teach or exercise authority over a man. Paul is making the point, here, that having official authority in the church is not something that belongs to a woman, and her role in the Church. The burden of responsibility to provide spiritual leadership for everyone – and to authoritatively declare the Word of God – it’s not intended for women.

And again – Paul isn’t claiming by this that men are inherently more skilled or valuable than women. But even biologically, it’s clear that men and women are different. When it comes to pregnancy and caring for babies, there are certain roles and responsibilities that are simply not intended for men. Men and women are equal in human worth and dignity – they participate equally in the forgiveness and eternal life that come through faith in Jesus. And yet the role of women in the church, or in the family, isn’t identical to the role of men. And when we rightly recognize this, and value this, it promotes the healthy, orderly functioning of the Church.

But there’s one last thing I’d like to clarify here. When Paul urges women to learn quietly with submissiveness (and to be quiet) the word that’s used for quietness in these verses most often refers to tranquility and peacefulness – not total silence. And so Paul’s emphasis here isn’t on the complete silence of anyone’s mouth. His emphasis is on the cheerful stillness of women’s hearts. Women here are urged to receive the direction they receive from church leaders with a peaceful contentment – with gratitude, even.

The Reasoning Behind Manhood and Womanhood (Roles for Men and Women) (vs. 13-14)

And in verses 13 and 14, he explains where he gets this idea of men’s roles and women’s role from in the Bible. This brings us to my third main point tonight, which deals with the reasoning behind manhood and womanhood. Paul points out two reasons why we should be content that official church leadership isn’t intended for women, but only for specific, qualified men.

First, Paul teaches that this is right because of God’s created order. In verse 13, Paul explains, “For Adam was formed first, then Eve.” That’s what we see in Genesis, Chapter 2. God deliberately shows us that the man and woman weren’t made at the same time. But the man was made first. And Paul explains that this is an indicator that the man carries the responsibility to lead. Especially since when God creates the woman, a bit later, Genesis 2:18 she’s created to be a helper for the man who uniquely fits him, who’s able to complement and balance his giftings with her feminine disposition and design.

And so we shouldn’t miss this – men and women have had different roles from the very beginning. In the paradise of the garden of Eden, the man’s role involved the responsibility of good leading, and the woman’s role involved helpful, supportive following. God intentionally designed man and woman like this – to be equal, yet different and complementary – kind of like the way a lid snaps onto a storage container. Both parts are equally necessary in order for the food inside to be preserved. And yet one part of the container carries more weight than the other. God has designed men and women to relate like this, and when they live out their roles rightly – in the family and in the church – it ultimately makes life better.

But Paul recognizes that we might sometimes have a hard time believing that. And that’s why he adds a second reason why we should be content with men’s and women’s roles, in verse 14. Because “Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.” Now, what we can definitively say from this verse, is that Paul wants us to see from history, that obscuring or reversing the roles of man and woman won’t work. It won’t make life better. Paul’s talking about Genesis 3 – about the event that brought sin and death into the world. The woman led the way, and made the decision to follow Satan’s advice. She ate fruit from the tree that God had strictly forbidden, and gave some to her husband. And it brought corruption and death.

Paul’s reminding us that when Adam failed to lead his wife, and Eve decided to give marching orders to her husband – the result wasn’t greater freedom and life for her. Instead, it led to bondage and death. And so this is an important word of caution for us. When people come up with gender theories that are different from what the Bible teaches, you need to be suspicious of them. If you’re tempted to be suspicious of what the Bible says about men and women – you should be even more suspicious of the theories and ideas that were invented yesterday. God understands the reality of our world better than anyone else. Because he made it. He designed it. He knows what is really best for us, and for the strength and health of His Church. And so there’s good reason for us to embrace God’s teaching on gender roles – even if it doesn’t initially sound good to us.

The Rescue of Sinful Humanity (vs. 15)

But after identifying the transgression of the woman, at the end of verse 14, Paul then goes on to make one more comment, about how the woman – and how sinners like her – will be saved. And this will be my fourth and final point tonight, concerning the rescue of sinful humanity.

In our last verse, verse 15, Paul says, “Yet she will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.” Now, I recognize, this verse is worded in a somewhat confusing way. But I think it’s intentional. Paul seems to be making two distinct comments, that relate to two different audiences of sinners.

Paul’s first comment is made about Eve. And he says that she (singular) will be saved through childbearing. Of course, he isn’t claiming that delivering a baby will make someone’s sin go away. But Paul’s acknowledging that when Eve originally tried to take over her husband’s leadership role, it led to death. But when she later embraced her womanhood, through bearing a child – Paul points out that it led to salvation – by bringing forth the family line of the Savior, Jesus Christ.

Even terrible sinners like Eve, who made such a devastating decision for herself and for the whole human race – Jesus can save even her. Because Jesus traded spots with her – he took her guilt and blame, and he gave her his perfections and God’s favor. Jesus came to be struck down in her place, so she could be raised back up to paradise with God. And the same is true for you, if you trust in Jesus. The childbearing of Eve brings salvation – because it ultimately leads to Jesus.

But Paul makes a second comment to a second audience. Halfway through verse 15, he transitions to speak to women in general. “She will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.” Now, again, Paul could be telling women to trust in Eve’s descendant, Jesus the Savior. He could be confirming that Eve’s failure in the garden has not disqualified women from God’s rescue plan.

But it’s likely that Paul also wanted women in his own day to know that God will save and preserve them during the great challenge of childbirth. Even through the most difficult thing that belongs to womanhood – even through the intense pain of childbearing, which was given as a consequence for Eve’s disobedience – God won’t abandon women of faith. Those who trust in the Lord won’t be left under the curse of sin. They won’t be left desolate or disappointed. But ultimately, God will deliver his people from every ache and pain and evil thing.

But in the meantime, God has gathered his people to labor together and to love one another. He has ordered Christian homes, and the Christian Church, according to policies and principles that are trustworthy and profitable for our good. And his good design includes laying out a grid for Biblical manhood and womanhood. So as a church in Mt Pleasant, MI, let’s seek for our viewpoints to be rightly ordered by God’s Word. And let’s ask that he would show us the goodness of all his ways as we walk in faith. Please pray with me: